129. Drop Fear, Make Empowered Decisions with Cinthia Varkevisser & Michelle Walters

Welcome to Mind Power Meets Mystic. The show where practical mind power and mystical wisdom collide with humor and wild curiosity. Yeah, we're not here to play it safe. I'm Cinthia Varkevisser, your resident spiritual shit disturber. I stir things up with mystic power and bold action. And I'm Michelle Walters, coach and Hypnotherapist. I bring strategy and transformative hypnosis to help you turn subconscious blocks into unstoppable momentum. Let's shake up your thinking, dive into your soul and make bold moves in your life. We'll take you on a journey of breakthrough and aha moments, exploring spirit, business, love relationships and self expansion. We're connecting you with your highest self and flipping fear into strength. So buckle up. We're doing this one wild, transformative conversation at a time.

Let's go. Welcome everyone. You are here for another episode of Mind Power Meets Mystic. It's me. I'm Michelle Walters. I'm the mind power, the hypnotherapist in this equation, joined by my dear friend and podcast partner, Cinthia Varkevisser, who is an intuitive healer and our show mystic, we are excited to bring you an episode today that is the theme of some upcoming workshops. We're going to be giving the name of our new workshop is called drop a fear, make a decision, and we will be offering this a couple of times, including one time in person on april 26 in San Francisco, in the afternoon. That's a Saturday. So Cinthia, let's have you start and tell our audience how you define a fear. Okay, I define a fear. First of all, fear is an emotion, and all emotions are finite. That doesn't mean that they're, you know, all small, but they aren't invincible. They aren't something that can cause you. It could cause a terminal illness. It is something that is finite, and things that are finite, the things that are emotional, are based in the past. So when you think about a fear, it's a fear that you have experienced before, and it didn't get the anticipated outcome. Okay? And so now, because I'm a woo, a woo, woo person, this can also happen while you're in the womb, right, as well as from a past life, but we're not going to go there, because that's not going to service. We can actually, no matter where this fear came from, this

this emotion that is greater than than the the actual thought of what it is,

can be resolved today. Okay, so anytime that we have something come up that's fearful, it's something where we had an unanticipated or unexpected outcome that makes sense. So what I like to do is I like to think that a fear is is a place where we're just unclear in that the clarity is going to lead us to our very next stage in life. So the very next stage in life is to make a decision. So why don't you talk about decision making? I think decision making is so vital, so important, and something that

a lot of people struggle with. I mean, I have struggled with decision making from time to time. One of the things that I think is

too unclear is that a lot of times we think about making a decision as like, oh yeah, I've decided I'm going to go to the store this afternoon. Well, in the way that I was taught to think about decisions, you haven't decided until you are actually, you know, driving on your way there, there is some commitment of resources, whether that's money or time or

signing a pact or contract. These are ways that people actually make decisions. The decision is incomplete until that resource allocation has taken place, and I think that's one thing that people tend to get a little bit confused about from time to time. I was very blessed at the early part of my career between undergrad and grad school. I worked for a company called strategic decisions group, and we helped all kinds of other companies figure out how to make good decisions. There's a whole framework that I learned from that job called the decision quality framework that I love to speak about and teach on. Because not only is it.

Relevant. If you're a big company trying to make a multi million dollar investment, it's a good framework. If you're trying to decide, should you buy a plane ticket to

to go on vacation next month? It is very helpful framework, and it can work in all kinds of decision making, and it is what I'm going to be teaching about in this workshop. So this workshop is going to be awesome. It's going to combine sort of the best of cinthias Wu and the best of my logic to be this unparalleled experience in terms of dropping a fear and helping somebody to get ready to actually make that decision.

You have been listening to Mind Power Meets Mystic with me. Michelle Walters and my co host, Cinthia Varkevisser, we want to tell you about a special gig the two of us have going on. It's called mind power meets mystic the project, and it starts off on a zoom call with Cinthia. Cinthia tell everybody what they can expect. So for the first half of our session, you will be with me, and Michelle will be very quietly in the background preparing to do her work. What we will do is that we will talk about the one thing that you either want to amp up or that you want to release, and through the intuitive work, I help you get boil it down to its essence, and then give you an RX of three practical things to do to set you on your way. And then Michelle magically appears. What is it that you do that Michelle, I have been listening in but not participating in the first half of the call. I have an excellent idea of what Cinthia means when she says something, and I have an excellent idea of quickly getting to what my client is all about and his or her individual strengths. I turn all of this into a 20 to 30 minute hypnosis session on the second half of the call, which, when we're done, I strip off and send you as an mp three that you can listen to over and over again. You also will have Cinthia's three point recommendations, and the recording of the Zoom call. It is a fantastic one hour offering a great gift for yourself or for someone you don't know what to get such insights, and we've gotten such great reviews. So if you're interested, send me or Cinthia an email. You'll find our contact information in the show notes, and we'll tell you how to get started.

So Cinthia, I thought we might help our listeners and potential workshop attendees better understand what we're talking about by sharing some stories about clients we've worked with who were looking at making decisions. Would you like to share one of those stories now? Oh, absolutely. Let's go practical. Let's go practical. And there's always intuition involved. But I would like to go to a practical one, because I think everybody can relate to this.

What's really important to see is that in any story, someone will have an objection, and that objection does not mean that that's where the fear is. However, it's really important to listen to the objection, because it leads back to the the fear, the name of the fear, so we could name it a whole bunch of things. Um, you know, it could be I'm mad at the person who cut me off when, really I have a fear of driving in traffic or in traffic jams, right? So that's, that's what's really important. It doesn't matter what the fear is. What's important is that we listen to what the objection is, and when the objection comes up, we know that someone is ready to make some kind of movement on it, right? Okay, so here's my favorite one, very practical. Some of my favorite people, my favorite couple, they came to me, and I know them through intuitive work. I know them through wool work, and they also know that I do real estate. And they said, You know what, I trust you. If I can trust you to talk about my emotions and all these truths, then I'm also wanting to trust you with the money that we have, that we have. You know, worked so hard in saving to take our next step. And I was really excited, super honored.

Based on some techniques that I had done, we got really clear on what is it that they both want? What were non negotiables were for both of them, because they're such a lovely couple, they'd already worked out a lot of things, you know, and and they talked about what was really important to them. So we worked within the area. We worked within, you know, the finances and everything was clicking along. However, every time we got to this place of, hey, it's within your budget, it's all these things, then I could feel the hesitation come in and it.

They, you know, you didn't need to be super intuitive. It was, you could see their face. Their eyes got big. It was right, deer in headlights type of thing. And then all the objections came up. What came out of it was that they had made an investment before, and the investment didn't turn out so well, and it it made them lose money and trust in in certain things. And so what we had to do is we had to talk about that. We had to talk about how long ago it was, what's the amount of information that they had, what was going on at that time with real estate, and then

this is a time because of the money, right? Because of the money fear. There are times when you need to talk to someone's wallet, and there are times to talk to someone's heart. And so intuitively, it was about talking to their heart and saying, these are all the great things that are going on. And once their heart opened up and they said, Yeah, these are, this is really good. And we talked about, you know, no house is perfect, not even brand spanking new houses. And you know, all the things that were imperfect was fixable by this, by this couple. And then we talked to the wallet, and the wallet said, you know, take, take a risk. Come on, let's do this. And I did some strong negotiations so that they could even feel more comfortable that whatever pennies were saved in the negotiations could go towards their thing. Now here's the best part. By the time we actually got to the end of it, and they, you know, they start falling into love with their house as soon as you know, the more they went into their thing, into their escrow transaction. They move in houses sold. Things are looking well, and a house

in their community goes up for sale at a much higher price point than what they bought. Oh, so they felt good. They felt like they they got in, yeah, they got in. Not only they got in, they got a deal. And it was absolutely right. They got in at the absolute right time, because then the market started going up again. So that's, yeah, it's a that's, that's my that's my story. That's a big story. Yeah, I have a story. I'm not sure my story is quite so big, but a gal I have known for years. I met her at work, had finished her career. She had done a lot of work, really, all over the country, but had finished up her her working years in New Jersey, I think, or New York or Pennsylvania, somewhere, somewhere in that part of the country. And she was looking at where she wanted to live, where she could afford to live, that kind of a thing. And she was in this quandary if she should relocate to Florida.

And she had a number of friends in Florida, not a ton, but some. And of course, it's sunny down there, and the weather is good, and her dollars were going to go pretty far that time. And she was, you know, really seriously considering this, but she wanted to talk to me, because she, of all things, she had a friend from her that that Atlantic, North Atlantic area that had moved to Florida, who drove her crazy. This friend of hers just drove her crazy all the time. And she was like, I don't know if I should move down there, because my friend might drive me crazy. And so I was helpful to help her get in touch with, really her heart and her powers and what what things she could do, what things were in her control, what things were out of her control, and really sort of figure out how to frame this decision and frame what choices she was making and and how was she going to negotiate some of these things, which, in her case, this was it was interesting that, in her case, her relocation, the primary issue was this move with this other person associated and she ultimately

worked with me and made the decision she was going to move to Florida. She moved to Florida.

She did, in fact, encounter a number of problems

with that woman in who already had lived in Florida, but managed to figure out how to set up her boundaries in such a way as to be able to, you know, not be in close contact with her, but still have something of a something of a connection, and she was very happy about having made her move to Florida. So that's, that's one of my examples. Do you have another example you could share? Cinthia, I do. And this is, this is a fun story for me, for.

Probably uncomfortable for the other person, but this is a fun story for me. So way back when,

when I first started teaching, and you have to remember I started teaching, I started doing intuitive work,

back in: 1992

and I had someone talk me into teaching starting 1993

and this was one of the times where the teaching was growing, having a really good time, and decided to do a

intention, intentional vision boarding class. And one of the people there, everything that they put on their on their board, they actually, at that time, we weren't doing a board. We were doing a binder because we wanted to, right. We wanted to not

compartmentalize things, but really focus on on all the aspects in our life, right? Didn't matter what aspect, we might as well just made one whole binder with no tabs in it. It was all Baby Baby, baby, baby, baby, baby. This person hadn't had a boyfriend, which meant that, and they didn't have a boyfriend, but it was Baby Baby, Baby Baby Baby, um, and we're just dying. We're dying because, you know, there were a bunch of us, and we known each other fairly well by the time well by this time, and we're like, all right, you know, so set that intention. Set that intention. Well, a little time goes by, not a whole lot, but we've already forgotten about our vision boarding, because we were doing our day to day. And there's this old friend who started coming around and showed interest in her, and she's like saying, I'm really not into this person. And I said, I said, Come on, just have fun. You know you're not dating anybody. You know we're not You're not doing anything, and right now you're,

it wouldn't harm you to have more friends, and so they do. So they developed this friendship, and he was very

he was, I won't say he was pressing, but he could tell he was interested. And he kept saying he was interested. He kept saying he was interested. And so finally we sat down, and she says, You know, I'm really not so sure. And I said, Hey, don't you remember you want a baby?

And she says, Yeah, you know. And I said, Well, what's the big deal? You know? What is the big deal? Sex is fun. You like having sex? I'm sure he likes having sex too. And, you know, there's a pretty good chance that there's a baby that comes out of it, and she's like, but what, you know, what about, you know, the logistics of all that? I said, don't worry about the logistics you have. You know, all you care about is baby. And you know, you could tell them, if you get pregnant, that don't worry. You got it all. You got it all worked out.

Lo and behold. Oh, and it was so obvious that just your little friends, you know, distant friends, would go, Hey, what's going on?

tion country, right? That was: 2122

with a big grown baby, with a big, grown, big, grown baby. Yeah, lovely, lovely, lovely, beautiful, beautiful, beautiful. I have a story about somebody who I helped make a decision about changing her career.

This was somebody who I worked with in digital marketing. She'd been on my team, and she was kind of getting tired of digital marketing. She's been doing it a long time. Kind of burning out. Wasn't sure what she wanted to do. She's the breadwinner for her household, so, you know, making a change in her career was made a big difference. She needed to move into something where she could make real money and make real money in, you know, not a very long period of time. And so she came to me, and she was like, I don't know, how do I how do I figure this out?

And so we talked about a bunch of things. We had plenty of time, sort of on the discussion side, investigating what information she needed, how she was looking at the decision, how she was evaluating the pros and cons, what were what were her values, what was important to her? And we went through all of this, and we also did some work in hypnosis. And lo and behold, she decided to change her career from digital marketing to being a real estate agent.

Okay, and she is now a real estate agent in California, and she's done very well as Cinthia well knows it's not the easiest career. It's not for everybody. It's quite competitive. It requires a lot of skill and discipline and people action and this kind of a thing. She has moved into this business and thrived, winning awards from her office and doing all kinds of things. And it makes me so happy to know that I had this little, tiny role of helping her build that confidence to make that decision, which, in her case, meant enrolling in real estate classes and stopping doing the digital marketing so that she could make the space in order to make that career transition. So she needed to drop some fears

and make a decision by actually taking steps in that direction. And it has all worked out so so well for her. Well, here's the thing about dropping fear is and I love this example, this story that you use as an example is that by you doing the hypnotherapy and also having these talks, what it does is that when when you can detach the fear from the actual thing that that needs to be looked at, it does create space that fear holds a huge amount of space in your energy. It's it's kind of like, is it right? It's random. It's wrong, right? Random operating memory that it's always buzzing in the background. And this is how fear works. And so just by separating a little bit and creating that opening, is all that needs to make that shift, to make that shift over. Do you have a last story to share before we sign off? I do. I do. Thank you so much.

I love this story because this is a big historical familial story. So I had

a client, come up to me. We were, you know, she was off and on, my client, for a couple of years, she had decided that it was time for her to get a divorce. There. There was a time, and, you know, she was at a time in her life where, you know, it was two separate lives.

And what she didn't realize is that the divorce was becoming messy,

and so becoming messy. Yeah, it was becoming messy and so

so to to make things a little bit easier, she let, she let him stay in one house. They own two houses. So you would think it would be, you know, very easy, one house, one house, and it was, but the house that she decided to keep is was a rental, and the rental was a family member. It was rented out to a family member. And so he stayed in the house that was designated his, and she moved in with family, and she found herself stuck. And she was stuck because she was living with a family member, and they had a dynamic since they were little and and she was in a place where she really wanted to change, and she also was renting to a family diet, you know, to a family member, where they already had decades old dynamic. And so what what we needed to go through were, here are the changes that that you're already making. Let's take the thread of these shifts, and let's see how you are now. You're no longer the same person. If you're not the same person, the dynamic cannot stay the same. You actually have to stay the same in order for the dynamic to stay the same. And so we really worked on reinforcing here's how you're shifting, here's who you are, and now allow your family members to either shift with you or to move on and in the relationship changes in a different way. It took. It took of a whole lot of work on her part, not a whole lot of time, whole lot of work. And I was so impressed by the amount of inner work that she did that within, I think it like once she made the decision. I think it was a two month, a two month thing that what the the family member that she was living with, the dynamic changed, and then the family member that was living in the house gave her

their notice that they were ready to buy a house, and so they were out. Within 30 days, it was, it was really lovely, and she moved back into her house. The divorce was settled, you know, right before that happen. And so she's incredibly happy where she is having that that freedom on so many levels. It is amazing what can happen when you are ready to drop a fear and actually commit to a decision. And Cynthia and I are so excited to be bringing this new workshop to the world.

Old, starting in April: 2025

and we may have some other links up as well for you to get to it. If you have any questions, please don't hesitate. Reach out to the two of us. We are very reachable and friendly and full of information. So thanks everybody for listening to this week's episode of Mind. Power me mystic and join us at our upcoming workshop

you've been listening to Mind Power Meets Mystic.